A CUP!
YES! A CUP!
ok, ok.. it's a tiki mug.. whatever... and it's about to be my new loose change receptacle. Look at it! Isn't it great?!?!
actually, this should be a blog about how Ebay is the devil. Because it is! Why? Because I wasn't even looking for a new change jar!! I didn't even need it, and I paid way too much for it! (yeah I know... totally out of character! and no, I don't know what came over me)but how could I NOT buy something called a Suffering Blue Bastard??!?!? oooooooh.... during the course of writing this blog, I've figured out what the destiny of this mug shall be..
and it goes a little something like this..
PHASE 1 : settle down, get married, have children (bla bla BLAH!!)... fast forward to GRANDCHILDREN .... at least 2.
PHASE 2 : concoct several background stories* of the Suffering Blue Bastard**, involving who he was, how he came to be, why he's suffering, and how I came to posess such a dumb looking object.
*Make sure stories are believable, while still incorporating such things as flying monkeys, inanimate objects that only talk when no one else is around, and magic dust. This will be the tricky part.
** Find a better word than 'bastard' to use around the grandchildren.
PHASE 3 : Tell each kid a different story, and then cleverly hide my amusement as they fight over who knows the real story.. all the while, each kid thinking THEY know the real story, cause I've told them they're my favorite.. of course I'd tell my favorite grandkid the truth... right? HA! WRONG! Then I'll laugh heartily at their having believed me.. mainly because I plan to torment my grandchildren often.. and by that point they should have learned not to trust me.
PHASE 4 : Hop on my metallic blue Rascal, and ride off into the sunset... still laughing at their stupidity. gah.. that's just beautiful.
FIN!
